:: in-de-pendent ::

A good friend of mine use to tell me,
'Dont be too independent. Otherwise the guy will think you dont need him at all.'
To which I reply, 'Define being too independent.'
And in the midst of completing an essay on Hang Tuah, my ever confused brainwaves decide to leave the discussion of a classical text to something closer to me - the subject of independence.
I have stuck at being clingy for a long time, years in fact - thanks to some brainwashing from an individual who try to excuse himself from a commitment by directing his weakness to me and had me eating my whole self-worth half the time I was convincing myself I could make things work.

Its tiring. The constant self-talk.
Comforting yourself in a continuous web of lies you created.
Its easier to believe your own lies for you know the consequences is your own to bear.
Eventually you get trapped.
And its the point, you no longer recognize the I in you.
But after awhile, when your faith befriended you again - it became a point of no return.
One of life's greatest lesson reveals itself: loving yourself is indeed a priceless gift.
You are a happier person.
Suddenly you knew what you wanted, you dream big - you trust you could reward yourself with what you define as success.
Then life decides to play little tricks:
when it start making you think of the thin line that separates independence and selfishness.
Pray tell,
Will you give up everything you build for a shot at happiness?
Will you throw away your dreams for a chance to love?

Because some sacrifices are worth making.
It gives you an assurance to a better future.
Gradually, you will realise that independence is far beyond thinking about yourself.

For giving is also taking.
And to take, you have to be prepared to give.

Told you, I have a confused set of brainwaves.
Hang Tuah, here I come.